A Real Pain review: Grief, explored
- Annie Khurana
- Jan 22
- 4 min read
In the press tour for the movie, Keiran Culkin mentions that Jesse Eisenberg, who is the writer and director of the movie, did not see his work in Succession before deciding to cast him. After having watched the movie yesterday, I have to admit that I see what Jesse likely saw in Kieran.
Keiran, who plays Benji in ‘A real pain’ is effortlessly charming, irritating, broken and a 'real pain in the ass' all at the same time. It could be the actor informing the character, who’s to say, but Keiran’s ability to embody an open wound is something he has carried over from 'Succession' and continues to do brilliantly in this movie. Benji is more open about his pain than Roman Roy who was the poster child for repression was, but the pain itself is undeniable. It is written all over his face in the opening and closing shots of the movie, because this kind of pain just doesn’t go away with any experience, however cathartic it might seem. On the opposite side of the spectrum is Benji's cousin played by Jesse, the socially awkward David.
I have always found stories about siblings fascinating, and even though these two are cousins, their roots are the same, and it is these common roots that lead them on this journey of exploring their heritage and their past. The love between them is undeniable but as is common with family, so is jealousy, worry and annoyance.
As is common, one sibling is the more extroverted, social bird, and Benji is the literal definition of that. David’s envy of Benji for being able to connect with people despite not even trying is painfully relatable. However inappropriate Benji behaves, he is still well-liked, something David just cannot relate to. His own philosophy on pain is that it is a part of life. There is no escaping it, and one’s pain does not triumph anyone else’s, nor is it fair to burden others with your pain. He copes with his personal afflictions by medication and meditation, carefully curating his life to be the most optimized. But this denial of pain and not having anyone to burden it with is what has potentially led to a previous overdose attempt by Benji, who, throughout the movie laments how close he was with David and how he no longer feels important in his life now that he has an adult career, marriage and kid. We don't fully know the struggles Benji has gone through, but this unrecognized grief is now spilling out of Benji, and his open vulnerability that connects him with his tour group in a short span of time can also quickly turn ugly and threaten to completely take over.
I was expecting a bigger emotional climax than what we got, given the subject matter of Holocaust, but the movie refrains from it (Jesse explicitly mentions in interviews that he did not want a self-congratulatory tone to movies that tackle such serious, untouchable topics), instead immersing us in the personal experience of the group. The whole trip is about exploring the pain endured by previous generations, and how it can be overwhelming in the present to grapple with confusing feelings it brings up. There is hope to be found but there is also guilt, discomfort and catharsis. Those feelings are not force- fed to us - instead we are stay in the discomfort of the tragedy with the characters. Words cannot encompass the horror of the past and so, it is silence that is allowed to linger.
While departing at the airport, Dave tries to reach out to Benji, but Benji knows better than to let his pain seep into David’s life, refusing his attempt to help. And we are left where began - Benji, the real pain, in real pain.
Annie for your thoughts:
Funny moment: The tour guide saying a heartfelt goodbye to Benji despite being shattered earlier by Benji’s blunt feedback on his academic oriented style rather than a people oriented one was sweet, immediately followed by a quick ‘Bye Dave’ and nothing else. Dave's un-remarkability is special.
Keiren just clicks with older women, doesn’t he? And I don’t mean romantically. He has an easy chemistry with Marcia, which reminded me much of his chemistry with Gerri on Succession.
I cannot express how much I could relate to David’s consistent irritation with Benji throughout the movie- like needing to take control of the conversation, his free bird, unfiltered attitude, and his general existence. I found myself groaning and chuckling on more than one occasion. Every time Benji seems to step out of line of the social norms, I could feel the panic in Jesse’s eyes - and despite the reviews which are understandably praising Keiran for his raw emotion, I really enjoyed Jesse for his queasy restraint.
A different take on "You have your mother's eyes, Harry"- "You have our grandma's feet, David".
Jesse's fascination with Keiran as an actor is really unexpected and sweet. In his own words, he is like a 'Hollywood director falling in love with the leading lady'. Well, I hope he continues to work with his new-found muse.
Hi reader, if you are still here and like my content, please subscribe to the mailing list where I send you articles as soon as they are out. I am excited to cover more characters, shows, and topics, so your recommendations and thoughts are priceless!
Commentaires